The Science of Relationship Health Scores: How AI Measures Connection Strength

Relationship health isn't just a feeling — it's measurable. Decades of research in social psychology, communication science, and evolutionary biology have identified the behavioral signals that predict whether a relationship will thrive or fade. Yenesow's scoring model is built on this research. Here's how it works.

What Is a Relationship Health Score?

A relationship health score is a number from 0 to 100 that represents the current strength of your connection with someone. Green (70-100) means the relationship is healthy. Yellow (40-69) means it needs attention. Red (0-39) means you're at risk of losing touch.

It is not a measure of how much you care — it is a measurement of behavioral signals that research shows predict relationship quality and longevity.

The Four Factors Behind the Score

The Research Foundation

Connection Goals: The Strongest Signal

Oswald, Clark, and Kelly (2004) in Communication Research showed that regular, brief interactions maintain friendships more effectively than infrequent, lengthy ones. A 5-minute call every week does more than a 3-hour dinner every 6 months.

In Tune Up, you set how often you'd like to connect with each person. The AI measures whether you're meeting those goals — not by tracking your messages, but by the context you share in-app and when you mark outreach as done.

The Friendship Formation Timeline

Hall (2018) quantified friendship formation: roughly 50 hours for a casual friend, 90 for a friend, 200+ for a close friend. This informs our decay model — newer relationships need more frequent contact, while established ones are more resilient.

That is why Mom stays at 92 even if you skip a week, while a new professional contact drops faster. The relationship has more stored capital.

Dunbar's Layers

Robin Dunbar's research (2010) identified concentric circles: 5 intimate contacts, 15 close, 50 good friends, 150 acquaintances. Each layer requires different maintenance. Our model adapts — we do not expect you to call a professional contact as often as your sister.

Responsiveness: The Quality Multiplier

Reis and Shaver's (1988) intimacy process model shows that perceived responsiveness — the feeling that someone notices and cares — is the foundation of deep relationships. Missing a birthday measurably hurts. Remembering it has an outsized positive effect.

What the Score Does Not Measure

Emotional depth. We do not read messages, so we cannot assess conversation quality.

In-person interactions. If you see someone daily but never text, our score will not capture that.

Relationship satisfaction. A high-frequency relationship could still be stressful.

Reciprocity. Currently we measure your outreach, not whether the other person reciprocates.

A relationship health score is like a step counter for your social life. It does not tell you everything about your fitness, but it tells you when you have been sitting too long.